Arm Explosion Sounds Cool

It's been a while since I wrote my last post. Everything has just been so hectic. Between work, school and all the appointments I haven't had a moment to myself. I'm almost done my last project for my course, and then all that's left is the exam. Exciting!

Yesterday was Skyler's appointment with endocrinology. It went very well. I think his endocrinologist was surprised by just how much I know and how I was able to discuss everything using all the medical terminology and keep up with him without him having to dumb anything down. He said the things we already knew basically, no testosterone during the last test, he's still growing on his own without growth hormone, chances are though that once he's a bit older he will need the growth hormone replacement. His hydrocortisone and thyroxine levels are fine, so we'll keep those medications at the same dosages. Still can't find his scan (MRI) from the hospital he was born at, he'll be sending a paper looking for that.

While we were in the waiting room C and I were looking at the brochures for MedicAlert. It reminded us that we need to get Skyler a bracelet, and when I looked at the list of "reasons to get a medicalert bracelet" I realized I needed one as well. If I were in an accident and became unconscious or something and a doctor ordered an MRI my arm would burn up from the inside and probably explode. I have two metal braces in my arm on either side of my humerus and interlocking screws all the way through it. So I ordered Skyler and myself each a medical bracelet. I didn't go through MedicAlert because it's $40 a year for one bracelet. I used Universal Medical ID because it was only $45 for mine and his combined and you don't have to pay for it every year, just once. I made sure they both matched too so Skyler's and mommy's are alike.

On Friday his CNIB OT came over. It was a lovely visit as usual. I adore her so much, she just has such a positive attitude and a vibrant personality it rubs off on you whenever she's near. I showed her how Skyler is tracking his black and white cards, she was very impressed and took lots of notes. I asked her if she knew of any good books for teaching blind children and she said that the CNIB published a book (that she wrote a chapter in) and that it's actually more for the people who work with the kids than the parents. But she said that with my background and schooling that I'd definitely get a lot out of it. She said it's a $50 book but she's going to see if she can track down a copy for me. I'm extremely excited.

My family is well my family. My dad called my mom and told her to leave me out of it. He called me and apologized for everything and asked how me and C and Sky-guy were doing. He said "I don't want you worrying about this stuff with me and your mom. You have your own family to take care of, and that's what's important. You have enough to deal with, without all of this added nonsense." So obviously I'm still involved somewhat, and still hearing about it, but he gets it and that's what matters. He doesn't bring it up with me, and just wants to know how his little "Sky-Guy" is doing when he calls. So I'm hanging in there, not doing too bad.

I'm just excited right now, the sun is finally shining and I've discovered a new craft thing that I'm obsessed with. (It's always something with me..) Scrapbooking! Yeah I know everyone is doing it. I was reluctant at first, thinking what's so exciting about gluing pictures onto coloured paper.. But my love of smiley Skyler pics and sparkly stickers won out and now I'm one of those people. Oh and I can't wait for Sunday! Why? Because "today is the day the day the teddy bears have their picnic!" I'm not sure if the Teddy Bear's Picnic is just a manitoba thing or not. Anyway it's tons of fun and I used to go every year as a kid. Everyone brings their teddy bear and they have a "B*A*S*H* tent" where doctors and nurses fix your teddy bears booboos and perform minor surgeries or put on bandaids etc. There's live music for the kiddies and face painting and snacks and crafts and games. Come to think of it, it probably is a Manitoba thing since all the proceeds go directly to the Children's Hospital.

Wow I have rambled on longer than I thought, I've got to be getting ready for work right away. I'm hoping to bring out a picture of N, and bring some stickers and paper and let her try out this scrapbooking thing for herself.

One More Thing

You know how I was overwhelmed yesterday? Well N slept the afternoon, I left Skyler with C, and I was in the middle of getting my school work done when my mom called me. She says she just got a letter in the mail from the land titles office and my dad is staking a claim on the house. (Which is entirely in my mom's name. They were never technically married, they were common law. She put the down payment on the house before the two of them were together.) So now he is trying to fight her for the house. She called me, frantic, not knowing what to do. Telling me that her and my brother are going to be homeless etc. I told her to call a lawyer. She wants me to tell my dad to come and get the rest of his stuff. I have to be the one in between, because my mom doesn't want to talk to my dad and viceversa and my brother hates my dad and obviously they're not on speaking terms since the whole incident where my brother tried to kill my dad because he said he was moving out.

Oooh C just put on 21 Jumpstreet.. What was I saying?? Right, family blows. So I get off the phone with her and try to go back to my school work but now I can't concentrate on anything at all. So today I still have homework to do before my class tonight because I couldn't get back into the right mindset to finish it yesterday. Haha so much for being overwhelmed. I'm not even worried about our bills now. I'm more worried about my entire family being at war with each other. As much as I'd love to distance myself (remove myself in fact) from the whole situation I can't. Unfortunately I want my parents to be a part of my son's life, and that means talking to them. And talking to them means hearing about it. And hearing about it means being involved in it. *sigh*

So after work yesterday I took a nice long nap. I was exhausted and drained. And then at night Skyler decided he couldn't sleep so, I literally got about 5 minutes of sleep last night. It's a good thing I took that nap. I had wanted to go to the gym this morning, but I'm too tired to do much of anything now. I'd like to go back to sleep but I have to go to work in a couple of hours and I still have homework to do, and then I have class. I had intended to write a post about Skyler, but I think it will have to wait until I get some time.. I hope you all are faring better than I am at the moment.

As I keep telling myself: This too shall pass.

Overwhelmed

Lately things have been overwhelming me. Which is odd because normally C is the one who gets overwhelmed with things while I take it in stride. I think I'm just panicking because I'm almost done my course, but I still have so much work to do before my last class tomorrow night, and I'm panicking because of the bills. C keeps adding more expenses. He's a sucker I swear. One of his friends somehow convinced him to sign up for a life insurance policy for the three of us which costs $64 a month. The only thing is we both had our own already.. Mine only costs $15 a month. The one he signed us up for costs double that each. And I didn't agree to it. He just signed the bloody papers without me, and then pressured me into signing them, while they were there so I didn't have time to read it over or fight with him about it. I wanted to wring his neck.

And the weather here. I tell you it feels like it's prophesizing doom. It is still not anywhere near anything resembling the beginning of summer! It's barely even spring. I keep thinking it's fortelling the end of the world. I think it's a big part of what's overwhelming me. I can't deal with this gray, rainy, snowy weather anymore. It's ridiculous. I should be outside wearing shorts and a t-shirt enjoying picnics and long walks, not bundling up in a cozy sweater crocheting a thick wool blanket in front of the tv. Baking things just to warm up the apartment. I'm losing my mind in here. Last night we had frost, just to ensure that anything anyone had the nerve to plant is now dead. No May flowers for you losers in Manitoba, enjoy the eternal winter.

I swear I feel better today than I did yesterday. That's saying a lot. Heh. Anyway, Skyler is doing well and that's all that matters. Yesterday I made him a little book with our home visitor. I love it very much, it was a great idea, and the girl who comes to visit us brought the textured fabrics so we could do a texture book for him because of his lack of vision. So I cut all the shapes out of the different textures, and since I don't know braille yet I just wrote each shape out in ball point pen on the back of the card pushing it into the carpet so it would be upraised on the front. This way he can feel the words, even if he can't read it, at least it will get his fingers used to feeling bumpy paper. It's a very cute book, and I'll take pictures of it later.

But for now, I am off to work. Crossing my fingers that N takes a nice long nap today so I can finish my homework..

Destructinator

Yeah, just call me Destructinator. I think if I could have read my horrorscope for the long weekend (an accurate one) it would have said something like "Stay the hell away from anything that could possibly be broken, especially expensive things like your bestfriend's laptop." I'm not sure I can count the amount of crap I've managed to accidentally destroy this weekend, but on top of soaking a laptop in absinthe (at least I wasn't drinking it, like that's any consolation) I've managed to snap my crochet hook in two and give myself the most nasty black/blue bruise on my leg ever. I'm not even sure how I did that last one.

And C's sister in the hospital. I'm pissed about it. She invited us to meet her for lunch last week, and played with Skyler and then after she hands him back to us, she says "I'm going to the doctor now, because I've had a fever for 3 days." Uh.. We had told his family the rules, if you're sick, stay away from our baby, he's small and premature and susceptible to stuff. So she went to the doctor and apparently has mono, and they want us to get Skyler tested for it. And today C had to take her to the hospital because her throat is all closed up and she can't eat or drink anything. Lovely. I'm very sorry she's sick, really I am, I'm worried about her too. BUT hello could you not have respected our wishes and maybe told us you were sick before you started playing with our baby?? His family makes me want to rip out all my hair and eat it. UGH. If my baby is sick... I'm going to be one angry mama bear.

So yes in short, I'm clumsy, accident prone, bad luck follows me everywhere, and the weather this weekend blows. Snowed yesterday, +20 today.

ETA: C brought the laptop back from the dead yay!

It's Snowing

It's May 16th and it is snowing. That is all.

Success!

Skyler's been feeling better the last few days, finally not fussing as much, sleeping almost through the night, he usually wakes up once around midnight or so, has a drink and goes back to sleep.

And now for the exciting part, he's eating solids! YAY! Turns out he just didn't like the taste of the baby rice cereal and that's part of the reason why he's been spitting it out. Last night I went out for a bit and the baby got hungry so C decided to try some butternut squash baby food, Skyler ate it quite happily. This morning I mixed together some rice cereal and some peaches and he ate quite a bit more than I expected he would, I was so proud. Then afterwards I topped him up with some breastmilk.

New things in my life? I don't know, I can't seem to think hehe. Yesterday N was putting me down for a nap, and her new thing is she has to read a bedtime story. So her bedtime story for me was "Once upon a time there was a beeeeautiful princess named Britt-Britt who lived with her mommy and daddy. The end. Now go to sleep!" and she tilted my head to the side. Haha so cute. And she's gotten better with Skyler, she's no longer trying to "share" his toys by taking them away. Now she grabs his toys out of the bag and brings them to Skyler and puts them in his hands. "Baby Skyler's toys! He's playing with it Britt-Britt, look" I can't get over how amazing her language abilities are.

Today C and I were discussing one of Skyler's drugs that was supposed to be couriered to us (twice) but wasn't. We called the pharmacy and told them we'd just go get it since they can't seem to send it over here properly. It's an injectible one, and on the 25th we have the appt with his endocrinologists to get his testosterone, which is another injectible. Then we remembered that he'll have to have injections every day of his life once he starts growth hormone replacement. He'll have growth hormone 6 days of the week and testosterone on the 7th. He'll also need his thyroxine and prednisone every day(twice a day for the pred).

Seems that in getting caught up in everyday life and having his drugs as part of our routine we had forgotten about him being different. I find that I often do. It isn't until I say something outloud to someone else that I remember that he is not like every other little baby and we are not like every other parent. We do have a lot of extra stuff to remember, and in getting caught up in living I forget that we're not the same as other parents. Sometimes watching other mommies and babies interacts reminds me that we're different. Sometimes seeing a baby look lovingly at their mommy reminds me. But I look down at him, his eyes wandering and his huge smile in response to whatever I'm saying and I feel like I am the lucky one.

Schedules

I was reading one of Stacie's posts over at Never Clever and decided maybe it's time to try to get Skyler on something resembling a schedule. Especially since his has been so messed up the last few days and it's making me crazy. I'm going to try (crosses fingers) feeding him first thing in the morning and then leaving him home with his daddy, feeding him on my lunch break, and then feeding him after work, and throughout the night. The plan should go alright so long as he is eating solids. Which he should be by now, but is still trying to get the hang of.

C wants him to sleep in his crib now instead of with us. Which will make things a bit harder on me. But if Sky can sleep through the night (fingers crossed again) then maybe it won't be so bad. I'm going to take this whole schedule thing slow and not rush into things. For the first while I'll probably only leave him with daddy in the afternoons or something. And we're working on the eating cereal thing. He's still sort of pushing most of it out with his tongue, but he's getting better, and I'm hoping if we keep trying he'll figure it out.

Anyway that's all I have time to write right now. Hope you all are well.