Sunday, December 21, 2008

Happy Yule

He's doing about the same, but I am doing much better.

Last night was great, we had friends over, celebrated together. Had a nice meal, good conversation. Presents were exchanged. C and I even did some holiday baking yesterday afternoon and spent time together just actually enjoying the day. We saw the baby of course, I finished his sweater and a matching hat which I brought today and took pictures of him wearing.

Yeah went to see him today, C held him for over 2 hours. Which is amazing we often just get to hold him for the 10 mins of tube feeding and then have to return him to his plastic box. But lately we have been spending hours snuggling him after his feeds. His sats were perfect the entire time.

And it's time to talk about the GOOD nurses. Lol yes we do have some of those. It's just the bad ones that get me so riled up that I need to vent. So I forget to mention the ones that make my day. We have this one nurse, S who is usually on nights with him. She is fantastic. She cuts little shapes out of his tape for his face. yesterday he had stars, today he has moons. Which is perfect and completely fitting as we celebrate Yule/Winter Solstice today.

The day nurse he's had for the past few days including today, R, is great as well. She lets us hold him as long as we want. Her words were "If he's happy I'm happy" which means we can hold him as long as we want if his sats are fine. She even said it's good for his knees (he doesn't sat well unless he is on his tummy usually and so his little knees have been getting so red) because daddy holds him on his back sometimes chest to chest, and it gives his little knees a break from the plastic crib (there's like a matress in it of course but it's very firm and not as soft on his little knees as his daddy's tummy. hehe)

There's another new baby across from us in the pod, and today we met his parents, we also talked to the mom of the baby diagonally across from Sky. It was nice, the 5 of us were talking and laughing and joking about our little ones. I felt almost normal.. Like a parent.. I think because they get it, they understand. I can feel like a parent with the other parents in the NICU. Whereas in public in my normal everyday world outside the hospital everyone else is walking around with their babies, looking like parents. Whereas no one would guess I was ever pregnant.
I have been much better since I talked to my daddy. I admit he was drunk and rambled a bit, but he was right. And my entire perception has changed. I no longer say "if he were home we could _____" Now I say "when he comes home we can ______" and it feels so much better. I'm no longer letting myself think of the if's. I have decided that he is coming home eventually and I am going to focus on that.

Last night and this morning we brought in some shortbread I baked, to give to his nurses. Walking in with 2 containers of breastmilk and a plate of cookies I said "Hey we brought milk and cookies." ha ha ha. Attempting humour, see I am feeling much better. Anyway it is only a matter of time now. I am going to go find the camera and upload the pics of him in his new sweater. :D


Amy said...

I'm so glad that today is a better day. And yes, WHEN he is home you will ____, and _____, and it will be wonderful!

Mrs. Spit said...

I'm glad today is a better day.

You will be the only parents I know fighting to change the diaper.

And hello? Pictures of the hand crochets? On the baby? My fridge is looking empty!

Never Clever said...

Aww, I am so happy to read that you're starting to feel better!

How great that you and C can finally hold Skyler for as long as you want. How wonderful for the three of you!

Can't wait to hear more.

Take care :)

Ange said...

My goodness what a healthy chubby cheeked little guy he is. That breast milk is doing wonders. For sure he will be home soon and you will get to snuggle him for hours on end. Wishing you a lovely Xmas.